A Fallen Solider

The affect of the war has come close to home. My mom’s friend of almost 60 years, lost her 23 yr old grandson last week in a terrorist bombing in Afghanistan. Being at the wake last night was very emotional. The 6 Army soldiers that traveled with Steve, guard him 24 hours. The emotions on their faces, in their eyes were evident. The Governor of New Jersey greeted the attendees with words of attempted comfort.

Steve leaves behind not only family and friends, but a young wife and a 14 month old daughter. His daughter will never actually know her father. Steve was scheduled to return home next month.

As I proceeded to express my sympathy to my mom’s friend (who I know rather well), her daughter and family and to Steve’s wife, I couldn’t help but to feel angry…anger directed toward the war and those involved. Then came disbelief and sadness.

I watched the soldiers. I just couldn’t take my eyes from them. Two of the soldiers that took the trip, looked liked babies…so young… innocent to so many other things in life, yet seeing so much in their brief years. How sad to think that their minds will be forever affected. By what they must do, what they have seen…as with anyone associated in war. Here these two young men are not legally old enough to buy cigarettes or alcohol. Barely past the age to register to vote… driving experience of a very short time… Yet they are trained, handed a weapon and taught to kill to defend us. I can’t fathom that thought.

I made eye contact with one solider. We spoke silently. As he viewed the family pictures, scanned the room of family and friends, you could almost see his mind going in so many directions. As he turned with misty eyes, I extended my hand. We shook hands and to my surprise...he said "thank you"

Can you imagine? HE thanked me.

Before I left the funeral home last night, I shook hands with each soldier, with the exception of the soldier guarding the casket.

Thanking them for what they are going through for each one of us was the least I can do...

For each one who is affected by this war...who may have a loved one away from home, for each one who has lost a loved one...I am so very sorry you have to go through this experience.

Coping With Grief

Losing a loved one can be one of the most difficult and stressful experience we ever face in our lives. Yet an experience we all, unfortunately, will have to face and cope with at some point in our lives.

As my Dear Zubli wrote in a comment he left for me:

For each of us the inevitable moment. The one has returned to reality. While we are still in this movie, we shall prefer to say, I know that I shall pass this way but once, lest I forget to safeguard my only one chance, let me give purposefully the best now here and in the here after I shall gain, for I shall never ever pass this way again.

Loss can include the break-up of a relationship, a miscarriage, the termination of pregnancy, separation from family and friends (homesickness), loss of health, moving. Other forms of loss can still touch us so profoundly, such as the death of a pet or if you happen to be a medical or nursing student, you may have experienced feelings of loss when a patient dies. With loss comes a strong feeling that part of our emotional world has changed forever and can never be retrieved or made good.

When my cousin unexpectedly lost her husband at the age of 47 in April 2007 and then loosing her mom (my aunt) one month later, I wrote a Squidoo Lens on How To Cope With Grief.

Truth be known, it really was a way to help myself over come the grief I was feeling. Losing my Dad 7 years ago still feels like yesterday. I find that when someone close to me crosses over, it stirs up memories and sadness I felt from a loved one that previously passed on.

Doing research for my Squidoo Lens on the various forms of grief and finding ways to help get through it, made me realize that what I was feeling was a normal response to loss. It was very helpful to me and so I wanted to share it with others.

Now as I feel myself riding this carousel of loss once again, I turned to my own Squidoo Lens for support.

If you are experiencing any type of loss, please read How to Cope with Grief.
I hope it offers support and helps get you through.

I give you this one thought to keep

I am with you still -- I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow, I am the diamond glints on snow, I am the sunlight on ripened grain, I am the gentle autumn rain. When you awaken in the morning's hush, I am the swift, uplifting rush of quiet birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not think of me as gone -- I am with you still -- in each new dawn